Who Needs Trials, When You Have Gender Issues
by OKFandom
Summary: Who needs Trials, when you've got Team Skull? Guzma really needs to re-address the exact rules of the Team Skull dress code.


We felt this was a totally valid topic to see in Team Skull! Precious Grunt bbys.

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"Grunt G's a girl, yo!"

Guzma looked the grunt in question up and down, quirking an eyebrow. Said grunt was fully garbed in the male Skull uniform and shifting back and forth nervously. Seriously?

"So?" He coulda swore his team was made of teenagers, not five-year-olds. Was he REALLY getting complaints about a girl grunt wearing pants instead of shorty-shorts?

Grunt G visibly winced at the comment, looking like she was about ready to cry. Guzma was really at a loss when the first Grunt – C or something, it was hard to keep track of the letters when the number of grunts kept seeming to multiply – spoke out again, grabbing G around the shoulders so she couldn't leave the room.

"She don't wanna wear the boy uniform, boss!"

…Oh. OHHHH! Okay yeah, _now_ things were making more sense. Shit. He'd just fucked that up, hadn't he? Apparently, Guzma took too long to vocally respond, prompting the upset Grunt to squirm free of C and head for the door, obviously crying now. Shit, _shit_. "Stop!"

She did so, not turning around. At least Guzma still had that much control of the situation. "Get yo ass over here. And you!" He pointed at C. "Get the fuck out. 'N' tell Plumes to get her ass up here!"

Both grunts did as they were told, though somewhat reluctantly. Once C was gone, Guzma sat G on the bed and crouched in front of her. "Yo, kid, why you cryin'? Don'tchu know there ain't no cryin' in Team Skull?"

The girl sniffed and nodded, still trying to avoid eye contact. She rubbed at her eyes in an attempt to stem the flow.

"And ya know why that is?"

"Cuz cryin' ain't tough?"

"Fuck no."

She winced. Guzma sighed and dragged a hand down his face.

"It's cause we're family here, yo. You got problems, they ALL our problems, too. We gotcher back, kid. Now tell ya Boss whatsamatter an' who I gotta beat down!"

Shakily, and with many pauses, G told Guzma why she'd joined Team Skull. Like many of the other members on the team, her parents had kicked her out. They'd claimed she sure as hell wasn't their _daughter_ , and that she never would be, either. When she joined, she was still gun shy about the issue. Not knowing what to expect, she'd donned the boy uniform, not wanting to get kicked out of the _last_ place in Alola that she could go.

"The ONLY rule to the Skull dress code is the tank top, yo, an' that's gender-neutral anyway. Ya can wear whatever pants ya damn well please. Though, I ain't gonna guarantee ya ain't gonna get teased if ya come in wearing somethin' stupid." Guzma pointed out when she had finished, getting a sniffly laugh out of the girl. The change in mood put a grin on his face, glad he was able to start patching this shit up.

Plumeria chose just that moment to bang the door open, hauling in a bucket, towel, hair dye, and clothes in with her, a pissed look on her face.

"You're a fuckin moron, ya know that?" She snapped at Guzma, slamming the door shut behind her. "Ya coulda at LEAST told him to tell me what the fuck was goin' on!"

"You figured it out fine t' me." He shrugged nonchalantly.

She shoved Guzma off the bed at the comment and smirked as he squawked, crashing just as loudly on the floor. Looking over to G, the smirk turned into a much more benign smile. "C'mere, adorable lil sis. Let's get you all fixed up."

"Ya so cruel ta me, Plumes." The Skull Boss whined, jokingly, getting a kick to the side as his second-in-command led G over to his personal bathroom. "Oodf!"

A few hours later found C pacing. The doubt and his nerves had reared their heads a good hour after dragging G up to tell Guzma, making him panic about what he might've gotten his pal into. He managed to get himself so worked up that, when someone suddenly tapped him on the shoulder, he yelped and lost his footing. Looking up from his new position on the ground, he was shocked to find a very happy and very _OK!_ G, her hair dyed pink, and uniform switched. If he hadn't honed in on that, he would've noticed Plumeria and Guzma standing behind her sooner, both smirking at his reaction.

"Now just gotta let your hair grow out, lil Sis. You'll be rockin that look." Plumeria assured her. G grinned under her bandanna and nodded before hugging the Skull Admin, getting a warm squeeze in return.

"Ugh, all this mushy stuff gonna make me gag, yo." Guzma grumbled good-naturedly; Plumeria looked at G, then nodded towards him. G got the hint instantly. "Oof–!" The Skull Boss froze up when he suddenly found himself being hugged (tightly) as well, looking to Plumeria for help, not sure what do.

"Arceus, yer stupid. Hug her back, Boss."

He gave an awkward attempt at returning the display of affection, hindered in part by the kid's height in comparison to his own. G pulled away before it could get _too_ awkward, luckily. She thanked the two of them again, able to make eye contact this time as she helped C to his feet. The two grunts were quick to make themselves scarce after that, probably already thinking up the next acts of mayhem they would pull.

"I'd say ya done good Boss." Plumeria smirked and jabbed the taller teen in the gut with her elbow.

"Shut up."

 _FIN_


End file.
